Learning Spanish: don’t be embarazada…

When learning a new language, one thing we all want to avoid is making a fool of ourselves. For those of you learning Spanish, here is a little cheat sheet to steer clear of future embarrassment:

When asking for a spoon at a restaurant, be sure to say:

¿Puedo tener una cuchara, por favor? = Can I have a spoon please?

And make sure not to say:

¿Puedo tener una cucaracha, por favor? = Can I have a cockroach please?

Also if you have made a mistake, spare yourself further embarrassment by saying:

Estoy avergonzado = I am embarrassed

And be sure not to heighten your embarrassment by saying:

Estoy embarazada = I am pregnant

(or even worse – Estoy embarazado = I am a pregnant man!)

If you ask for an onion salad at a restaurant be sure to say:

¿Puedo tener una ensalada con cebolla? = Can I have a salad with onion?

And make sure not to say:

¿Puedo tener una ensalada con caballo? = Can I have a salad with horse?

Then, if you’re quite hungry after refusing to eat a horse, and you’re a woman, be sure to say:

Tengo hambre = I am hungry

And refrain from blurting out:

Tengo hombre = I have a man

Because that could invite some quizzical looks (especially from your date!)

Also, if you arrive back from a long trip away from your parents, be sure to say:

Estoy cansado = I am tired

And spare them a cardiac arrest by avoiding the phrase:

Estoy casado = I am married

Unless that is in fact the case…

Finally, if you’re exploring a mountain with your friend, be sure to specify whether you mean:

Vamos a la cima = let’s go to the summit

Or…

Vamos a la sima = lets go to the chasm

Otherwise you could find yourself lost in the harsh landscape of Mount Everest.

Any Spanish speakers out there with more examples to share?

Cameron